The following responses can come in quite handy. These are some useful responses made by young professionals, interns and other crazy employees.

1. I am currently out of the office at a job interview and will reply to you if I fail to get the position. Please be prepared

for my mood.

2. You are receiving this automatic notification because I am out of the office. If I was in, chances are you wouldn’t

have received anything at all.

3. Sorry to have missed you, but I’m at the doctor’s having my brain and heart removed so I can be promoted to our

management team.

4. I will be unable to delete all the emails you send me until I return from vacation. Please be patient, and your mail will be deleted in the order it was received.

5. Thank you for your message, which has been added to a queuing system. You are currently in 352nd place, and can expect to receive a reply in approximately 19 weeks.

6. Hi, I’m thinking about what you’ve just sent me. Please wait by your PC for my response.

7. I’ve run away to join a different circus.

8. I will be out of the office for the next two weeks for medical reasons. When I return, please refer to me as ‘Lucille’.